Talking about change. Out loud, in public.

One of the ways that I express my introversion (INFJ, represent!) strongest is my habit of keeping everything inside my head. I forget that other people are not privy to my thoughts, and I also forget I haven’t said something out loud yet. This leads to me assuming that people know what’s going on with me & my thoughts, when of course, there is no way they actually could. (Conversations with my husband often start out with me saying, “So, did I say this out loud yet or have I just been thinking about it?”)

I want to talk about some of that recent inner dialogue with you, because the thought occurred to me that I’ve been working on changes without explaining where these changes are coming from or why. I’ve been holed up in the creativity cave, working furiously with a step back now & then to look things over. Which led, of course, to some changes, as I mentioned. (Does that process ever stop? …no? Darn.)

I’ve often struggled describing what it is I do here, which is pretty intensely frustrating for me (as you can probably imagine). If I could do a Vulcan mind-meld with everyone who was curious about it, it would make things a lot easier. I get what I do & know how I help people, on a deep-gut intuitive level, but I often feel like I literally do not have the words to express it to others and make them understand. After working one on one with people, they usually say, “Wow, this is different than I thought it would be!”

Part of it is that I was leading with the wrong thing – organization and systems and productivity. While those are usually involved, my work is not actually about any of them at the heart of it. It’s about supporting, enabling, and creating a space for you to do your great work in. From what I understand, it’s actually very similar in nature to what a doula does. Just, you know, for a business vision instead of a birth.

I was also getting tangled up in the idea that I had to be teaching others how to do something, and that that was 110% necessary in any services I wanted to offer. I’m not sure exactly where I picked that idea up, but there you have it. The fact is, it’s much easier and more fulfilling for me to use my strengths to serve others instead of trying to teach someone else to think the way I do. (I’m sure it probably is for them, too.) Which isn’t to say that I can’t teach you some things, or show you useful tools or techniques. But I cannot teach someone else how to do something that comes as naturally as breathing to me. And that’s okay.

Given all of these internal shifts over the last few weeks, I’ve shelved my current services for the time being. I’m doing a lot of behind the scenes work right now (like the Morning Whip program that I mentioned on Monday), and I’m also working with a few select amazing world-changers. My current plan is to continue to hone & refine my description of what, exactly, it is that I do, and re-debut it as my main offering after the holidays, sometime in January.

In the meantime, there will be a few new & different ways for us to play together – keep your eyes peeled. One will be announced next week. Another is a co-creative project I’m working on with Melissa, that I’m very excited about. If the idea of setting the tone for 2012 with a day of genius sounds amazing to you, get in on the dispatch now so you don’t miss out on an exclusive deal.

And that’s it for today! Hopefully you enjoyed this peek inside my brain (it can be a scary place, believe you me). Any questions? And here’s a question for you: how do you deal with change? Welcome it? Hide from it under the blankets? Inquiring minds want to know – this is something I’ve found myself powerfully curious about since recognizing some of my own hang-ups in the area!

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